I went on holiday some years ago, with a few friends. In our crowd there were a few couples, some of us had gotten married already, and there were a few single friends, and one in particular. He was single. And desperate. All he talked about the entire holiday was about trying to find a wife. Every woman he met was immediately put through a 10 point analysis so that he could determine whether he should invest time getting to know her or whether it was a waste of time, as she clearly was not good wife material for him. However, some potentially good candidates escaped him before he could finish his assessment. And he couldn’t work out why.
Eventually I couldn’t take it any longer, and from a woman’s perspective I let him in on a secret: Desperation stinks. We can smell desperation a mile off. A good woman does not want to be the solution to a desperate plight. We want to be the prize sought after. We want to be wooed. We want to discover the delight in a relationship with the perfect partner.
And the same so often happens in the business world. We don’t buy from someone because they are desperate. We buy a good product that delights us in how it solves our problems. We don’t hire a desperate person. We hire a person who brings great skills to our company and delights us in making progress in that area of our business.
The late Jim Rohn highlights this when he said, “We get paid for bringing value to the marketplace. It takes time to bring value to the marketplace, but we get paid for the value, not the time.”
LinkedIn is the perfect place to look for a job. In fact by LinkedIn’s own admission they want to be the primary source of job seekers and employers and the ultimate place to find the talent that any company needs.
But when we turn to LinkedIn to make ourselves available, we cannot appear desperate. A desperate person will settle for any job, rather than hold out for the best position for herself and for the company.
You can make it known on LinkedIn, if you are available for new opportunities. You can connect to recruiters and follow the types of COmpany’s that you want to work for. And you can communicate with them directly and let them know exactly what value you can bring tho an employer.
But don’t appear desperate. It doesn’t work.
And my friend? Well he took a step back, spent some time with himself. Connected with old friends without any agenda. And one day discovered that he had fallen in love with a wonderful young lady. In fact, she was technically too young for him when he was desperate and it appears he had to wait for her to grow up before he could meet her.
Being patient is tough, but sometimes it yields the better result.